I have to say a lot has happen in just a month. I am not very surprised that I haven’t kept up with this blog. I did write worthy entries, but it was never posted. One of the main reasons why I haven’t publish anything on here is simply because I am very ashamed of the endless grammar errors I constantly make. I am not perfect, but it’s extremely elementary of me to not know my grammar rules. The “Comma” rule is definitely my biggest challenge. I just don’t know how to use it effectively.
I’ve had extremely rare epiphanies this past few month. Well I shouldn’t use the word rare. “Unexpected” or even “caught off guard” sounds more proper.
The future, school, life and everything in that entity has been on my mind for a long time. This last month, it became more prevalent. It’s like God is really trying to send me a message. And Satan on the other hand is filling my mind with negativity.
Well, how? I’ve been doubting myself a lot lately. Everyone is guilty of that at some point in their life, but mines has been too much. Its’ like the other person in my life, and I really want it out. I don’t want to live with such disturbance.
Also, I’ve been thinking about all the big decisions I have to make and to be frankly honest, I don’t know what to do. Which is why the future looks scary. As imperfect as I am I still want to make the best decision and not look back with regret.
Perhaps the one person who has given me comfort through this whole process is my heavenly father. He can never fail me. Yesterday, I had a really hard time concentrating while doing an assignment. Ironically a bible happens to be on the table I was using, so I opened it. Psalm 55 was the headline for the night. I was just so touched and relived after reading it. It was as if a huge weight was lifted off my body. I felt so much lighter. I’m always too scare to give my testimony in church. It’s mostly a fear of public speaking. But today, I testify that God is very much real and amazing. The changes that I’ve noticed in my life has been proved that I can trust in him. That miracles do actually happen. He’s been the only one I can pour my heart onto without been judged, or looked at differently. I’m so glad to have him in my life, as he’s the best thing that’s ever been mine. Just knowing that he’s there for me everyday and will never fail me puts my heart at peace. I know all the craziness I am dealing with will eventually pass. I put everything in his hand, and I will keep praying for as long as live. I know ” I can do everything through Christ who strengthen me” (Philippians 4:13).
As for my future, I am very hopefully. I am going to make a few changes. But changes are inevitable. They are extremely difficult to do, because we never want to change our way of doing things. It just has to be done. I have big goals in life, time to get serious and start making things happen, not excuses. I’ve learned this past month that there are no “short-cuts” to success. Then I started questioning why we have short cuts in general. I rather take the long way that’s straightforward , which will lead me to my destination than have to turn 10 times and not know where I am going at the end of the day. Bottom line, short cuts at times might be easier for it seems shorter , but in reality it’s actually long. With this said, I will be taking the long way home from now on.
I’m dictating this to everyone’s that’s in or ever been doubt about anything in life. Knee down and Pray, it would alleviate some of the pain, that I can testify to, because I am living prove that God is a man of wonders. I speak of which I know is true to my life and experiences I’ve been so privilege to have.
Today I challenge you to ask him to help you, I challenge you to pour your heart out onto him, and today I challenge you to pray without ceasing.